World War Z... makes me wanna buy a gun.

       SO I have been reading the book World War Z and I have a couple of thoughts about it.. One it is really good, not only good but well written... Two its a little freaky because it sounds like something that could happen and makes me want to move to a remote cabin in Alaska... and third it makes me want to buy a GUN, learn how to fire a gun, buy lots of bullets for my gun or guns and shine my guns.

I would recommend this book to everyone if I thought they would heed my advise....

The End of the World... maybe..

      So I was flipping through the movie channels pissed off because I have an ancient TV and I couldn't get it to switch inputs so I could watch Season 5 of Criminal Minds, and I came across the movie 2012. Now I had seen it before but I also do like an end of days movie and this one had really good graphics. Now I know what some people will say.. oh it was dull.. or I didn't like it, but you are just lacking in vision unlike myself. A movie with John Cussack and Amanda Peet taking off in an airplane just as the earth implodes  beneath their feet what could be better? No really I'm asking? That's right you cant come up with anything... that I can hear that is.

 While watching this fantastic movie I started to think about the end of the world and how many varying ideas there are.. Now I base my opinions of such things on movies and I have decided I would rather be killed by say a big rock falling on my head, then have to run for my life while dodging fire balls or tsunamis or what ever else comes down the pike.. Now I say all this but I know that at the first sign of  natural disaster, alien invasion or Zombie outbreak.. I would be the first to grasp a shovel and fight. Of course according to the Mayan calendar we all only have a year until the end of the world.. Although other movies point us to a different end... The Core tells us the earth will stop spinning... Yeah right... The Day after tomorrow tells us that the icecaps are going to melt so fast that temperature is going to drop so fast causing flash freezing.. when? The Day after Tomorrow of course.

 Resident Evil tells us that a deadly virus will turn some into flesh eating Zombies who will eventually infect all those who have not watched any zombie movie and do not have the skills to defend themselves, or the slow and sickly. Of course I will make it to the end of that outbreak because according to a facebook quiz I took  told me I will survive... so thats that.

 Final Destination tells me that I am going to miss my date with death and run around for the next hour and a half until death does his job and I die in a messy yet ironic fashion. In Legion, God turns his back on his people and send his angels to kill all humans and kill and take over their bodies as they search for a random women who will give birth to a random son who will randomly save the world. Mark me down for not wanting that to happen....

oooh I had to end that one besue he is hot...  anyways I could go on and on about the various End of the World plots that tell us another possibility for our demise... or maybe not because in all of these movies there are survivors which technically wouldn't mean the end of the world.  

Reality vs. Reality TV

         I sit here waiting for the new episode of Haven to come on and my mind has been going over quite a quandary.. How does reality TV fit into everyday life... now by my standards I think EVERYONE should watch a large amount of Reality TV and by all accounts most people do. Now some might go on with their blah blah blah's about the filth of TV and the Moral outrage.. or something of that nature... I'm not to sure I wasn't paying to much attention too it... there is a Bad Girls Club re run on.... wait what was I talking about? Oh yeah..  SO as I was saying I Love reality TV but sometimes I think about how these show would be applied in real life. So here we go....

                                                   Toddlers and Tiaras would become...

                                                          Just Children who are brats..

Now I know a lot of people think toddlers and tiaras boils down to child abuse but I have to say I love this show. Being able to watch these spoiled children and there deluded parents is fantastic. I mean spray tanning and spending thousands of dollars on children who will grow up to think they deserve the best in everything is THE best form of entertainment... I mean I'm glad I don't know these children and when I get tired of them and their annoying parents I can just turn them off.

                                                            Bad Girls Club turns into...

                                                             Bad Girls Behind Bars.

                                                             Big Brother would be...

                                                                 Stalking.

                                                                  Survivor would be..

                                                                 Like Castaway.


                     If you were in a deserted place and had to "survive" it would be like castaway..

                                                          The Real Housewives of OC..

                                                Are just Bitchy Rich Girls..

                                           Celebrity Rehab...

                                              would be  Real Rehab.. were you have to Pay $$

                                                      The Biggest Loser..

                                             would happen at The Gym...

                                                     Top Chef's

                                                 Usually end up working at Applebees..


       Now don't get me wrong I Love Every reality show on VH1 and Bravo... and some on MTV and Lifetime but I think some people (ie. young people) need to realize that reality TV is tightly controlled and never works out well in real life... Yes I'm talking about you Teen Moms, 16 and Pregnant should not be your main goal in life.

God's freaky plant

      Tomato planet

  So for the last couple days I've been taking care of our garden since my gardener.. ( pa kettle) has been in Alaska fishing. Watering takes for EVER.. and it makes me think of those that include gardening as a hobby. Now I love to look at the garden, sit in the sun next to the garden, sample from the garden and occasionally act like I'm gardening; but I've never had what one might call a green thumb. So I think the best thing I could do in this situation is take credit for the garden... There are Tomatoes, blue berries, raspberry's, peas, carrots, lettuce, Jalapenos.. etc etc.. but the most freaky plant there is The Strawberry plant.

        See the baby creepers....

      Strawberries..

  Grow Boxes

 Apple Tree we have at least 10 of them.

 Now you may ask yourself why this would be considered "God's freaky plant" but trust me its creepy... literally it creeps out and plants its babies among the others... gradually taking up the space of the other planets... Just like a disease.. and people don't seem to mind since they can only see the; yummy strawberries they produce. All the while the planets snicker behind your back as they plot their planet take over.. slowly but surely.. Also while out taking care of the garden I have to take Moseby along.. Moseby is my French bulldog/ Boston Terrier Puppy who can be a joy and a terror at times. He is gifted.. not gifted as in he can do tricks and go potty in the toilet.. but in the fact that you could vacuum and clean the entire house so there is nothing on the ground and he can disappear for a minute and come back with a with a stick or piece of paper, socks, trash, pantie hose.. something hanging out his mouth like Ta DA!! Anyway he has come to be my gardening buddy but I think he hates it, but as long as I play with him after he seems to except his lot in life.

    The Moseby

 It is so hard to get him to stand still..

 HES SO CUTE!!

       Classic Moseby..

                                       

That's right Bitch; I'm The Moseby...

 He is sooo funny and brings joy to my life... unlike the creepy strawberry plants that try to gain my trust.. Nice Try.

The Cushings Curse..

    I am awesome, I am so awesome that it built up in my head and caused a mass of awesome.. some doctors call it a tumor but I know the truth. When I was young my hands shook all the time and it didn't bother me much, so I ignored it.. when I graduated high school it was becoming so bad that I went to a neurologist. He proceeded to give me lots and lots of medicine, (you see he didn't know about the awesome build up) and plus he was kind of a douche. Eventually I became tired of his disdain filled doctoring and decided to take matters into my own hands. I made the appointment and flew down to Seattle and saw a specialist about my supposed diagnoses; Essential Tremors, which in fifteen Min's Doctor Dude proved Doctor Douche wrong... what.. a shocker. Doctor Dude then pulled in Doctor SmartyPants... Doctor SmartyPants then used his smartness and said that I had the look of someone with awesomeness buildup or Cushings and after two years of testing he proved that I did. Now I say awesomeness.. they may say cortisol buildup resulting in a tumor that was producing massive amount's of cortisol causing Cushing disease... But I prefer my version because Doctor SmartiesPants version was a little depressing.... Although when other patients found out a similar fate they wanted to research and wallow in it... although I did that at times too, I preferred to not think about it and or make a joke about it.. Laughter is always the best answer in my opinion. In May of 09' I underwent my first surgery to remove the awesome tumor.. FAIL... March 10'  the 2nd surgery.. WIN... or so I thought two weeks later major FAIL... the plug which well plugged up the hole in my head, came unplugged and I had a massive bloody nose and almost bleed out... not awesome. After some blood transfusions and a couple days in the hospital it was time to go home. Once at home I feel asleep on the couch only to wake up around 1am felling very... well wrong, if that makes sense.... and POP.. I made it to the other room before collapsing and screaming until the ambulance came.. I could not even enjoy the sexy men who came to help me .,. Honestly I don't even remember them.. I spent the next 44 days in the hospital. I had a CSF leak... and awesome leak that wasn't awesome. my spinal fluid was leaking out my nose.. told ya not awesome. I contracted meningitis, staff and pneumonia... Meningitis was the worst along with the awesome leak I couldn't move my body without fire racing through my body. I was later told that I hallucinated quite a lot during that time because of the massive amount of drugs I was on. I had a drain in my back to drain off some of the awesomeness so that the plug could heal, but then Doctor Evil came into the picture he did fix the plug but then upon removing the drain it snapped in half.. "No worry.." he said with his evil voice... "Just a slight surgery and all will be well.." liar. He ended opening me up about 7 inches to remove the drain and had to shave some of the vertebrae just to get at it. Eventually I did get out of the hospital and away from Doctor Evil.. Though it has been a long recovery I am technically in remission from Cushings.. BUT still have a lot of problems getting back to how I use to be before the Awesome tumor ah De-awesome-tized?

You can never truely go home again... Well unless you break in..

       This last week I put my dog Moseby in a kennel and flew back to Alaska for eight days. The trip started off fine but after the plane took off I started to get motion sick.. and on a plane is THE WORST place to get it.. well maybe underwater would be just because if you vomit it would just wash right back in your face.. I held my little sick bag and tried to sleep, but that's hard when every couple Min's they keep waking you up to offer you sucky pretzels and keep trying to collect the trash.. Like I'm hiding a large pile and they can sense that I'm holding back on them. We finally land in Anchorage and my friend Rissa and her son pick me and my mother up at the airport. Then my mother goes her way and I go mine. Clarissa Lil boy Jerry is sooo funny, While spending time with him I taught him the fallowing phrases, "Girls Gone Wild!".. "Hey Lady How Much?" and a song I made up that went like this.."A is for apple, B for Banana, C is for carrot and D is for Doo doo.." He thought that was the best one. I like to think that I am making a difference in the world. Everyday was  filled with running around trying to see all the friends that I can before I leave, and massive amounts of eating out, by the end of everyday I felt like my stomach was going to drop out the bottom end and rightfully so. I really enjoyed spending time with friends and family but one week is not enough time to do all the things I would like to do. I did drive past my old house and had a strong desire to knock on the door and ask for a tour to see the changes the new family had put in place. Then of course my mind had to expand on that though about waiting till they all left and using a credit card to let myself in, and then remember that I may get locked up or just look like a douche kneeling before the door trying to get back the credit card that had slipped through the door and was now in the house.. with my name on it.. I decided then that when you move you can never go home again.. its a oxymoron but hey..  finally the week was up and the flight back was much better..probably because we had an empty seat between us and I was doped up on motion sickness pills which knocked me the crap out. Now that's the way to fly....

Zombies are awesome yet scary..

So which would be better... Zombies or Aliens? I mean I know that both would be horrible, but we must examine the possibilities of both coming true in the distant future. I asked my mother this question and she told me that Zombies are not part of Gods plan.. I in turn had to point out the fact that it could be in the fine print.. I asked my bishop the question also and posed the question that if the Zombie Apocalypse would ever happen would God be mad if someone committed suicide if faced with the reality of being eaten alive and in turn your reanimated corpse eating others. He did say that he thinks it would be alright, because God doesn't blame those who lay down their lives for others.. I must say I do agree.
I must say that I do think A Zombie invasion would be more scary than an alien invasion. The question we should ask ourselves is ARE WE PREPARED?
Shelter, food, water, survivors and weapons are needed for both scenarios, but at least with aliens there is a chance that they will be peaceful.. I mean I am basing all of these FACTS off of movies but I think we can all agree that deep down inside we know that we should be prepared for all events, even for the ones that some will say (i.e my mother) that will never happen. Many books have been written on the subject of Zombies and we must admit that Zombies make boring books better.


Case in Point.


And sequels... well prequels

So before we write off Zombies and aliens as a non threat I think that people should know that I'm right.

To be prepared I think you should have a plan, just like a earthquake evacuation plan. I would think with a zombie invasion the best place one could hold up would be Costco.. Why Costco as apposed to say Walmart or the Mall? Well if horror movies teach us anything we know that the mall has too many unprotected doors and Windows and not enough food to last, until all the zombies have starved to re-death? Costco on the other hand has mass amounts of food, cleaning products, Electronics, Beds, Water, etc... Also has room to store your vehicle inside in case of the need to leave by force also roll caged doors, So your able to hold yourself up well... Make sure to do weekly ammo runs to be able to protect your wealth.. and others.. All of this could apply to an alien invasion BUT if aliens have the advanced technology to travel to earth and are hostile, I'm sure we would have no where to run... So mark me down for Zappage ( A new word meaning to be zapped)... All in all I think that we should all be aware of the idea that some day we will have to protect our own be that from Other worldly beings or the Re-animated walking dead... Have a nice day.

Doctors suck.... so does medicine

First of all I have had WAY TO MANY medical treatments and am coming to the end of my rope as far as im concerned. I have spent over 265 dollars on just four prescription re-fills so far this month, and I am sick of it. I was out today with my mother due to the fact that they were showing our house ( which always make me nervous just because I feel like everyone is juding me) and I got a call from one of my doctors and he said he was pretty much done with me as he doesnt know what else to do for me. How about fix me? I mean I am the first to say that some doctors are awesome, but I feel like I have been sliced and diced and now no one wants to play with me and their reindeer games. Also It is SO SO SO expensive, I feel like I need to start a foundation called "Sarah's Broken Money pit"....Last night when I was talking to my mother about my finances she told me I need to be frugile and I told her,.." I cant when They gave me a blood transfusion, they gave me pauper blood. Which makes me spend money." She didnt think that was very funny..... but I did...

My atempt at "blogging"

So Ive decided to start a blog and I have no idea how to do this but we will see how this goes. First of all before this gets started I will have to say Shut-up!! This of course being for all of those who will want to correct my grammar/ spelling. I live in Alaska (although not for long) and am moving quite soon to a small town in Washington. I hate cinnamon rolls, Not because they taste bad...but wait... that's right they do! I love high heel shoes which I refer to and think everyone else should refer to them as Hooker Heels, and Love Love Love the show How I met Your Mother!! I am Awesome... which most people would agree (if they really thought about it) and I think that the movie Water World was not as bad as everyone tried to make it.I mean we all know that it was a bad idea. Plus they should have just cut the map off the back of that girls back in the first 5mins and called it a day.... BUT Kevin Costner with gills???!? That is Priceless!! The last book I read was Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and I loved it!!! And I cant stand coconut... That's right... know why??? because its like eating beach-y grass.... and its a texture thing.